When did I become a watered down version of myself? I used to spend my evenings in concerts and coffee shops, my days filled with music and poetry. My ringing phone played Wilco from the pocket of my thrift store dress. I sat in the sunshine at fountains filling notebooks with words and wisdom. I flaunted my red hair, my strangeness. These days I'm all about working. Eight hour days followed by eight hour sleep. I clean house and watch TV and ignore myself. Forget the makeup, forget the fashion- I live in my yoga pants on my trips to the grocery store, and where else do I go? Never far, and never anywhere exciting.
"While all bodies share/ the same fate, all voices do not."
This is one of my favorite quotes from a poem by Li-Young Lee and I often wonder, what would remain of my voice if I were to die tomorrow? Some pretty pictures? The memory of a "nice" girl? A few poems that no one ever read?
Who knows me as the introverted book nerd, passionate about music and language, with a strange style and a sense of adventure? I'm still that girl when I'm wandering the streets of Savannah with my camera, watching strangers and soaking up the sunshine. I'm still that girl when I'm cuddling on the couch with my doberman and my kindle.
But how often does that happen?
It's time to take back my time. It's time to leave the house a mess and read more books instead, to spend my afternoons in bookstores and sample all the coffee shops in Savannah. It's time to write more poetry and and wear more dresses.
It's time to find myself again.
Who's with me?
What part of yourself have you neglected recently and how can you bring it back? I'd love to hear your experiences and advice.